Is It Just Me

Is It Just Me
By: James Dubeau

Is it just me
Or does it just suck
When you wake up
Expecting a day off
When in return
All that you get
Is one phone call
A dirty
Little
Phone call
That asks
No
Demands
That on the day off
The day for relaxing
The day for production
The day for errands
That work beckons

Food For Thought

Food For Thought
By: James Dubeau

Flag atop the pole flutters
Wind howls across the parking lot
Owl perched atop the branch
Field mice scuttle below
Under his watchful eye
When one seems slow
Lame
Easy pickings
Swooping down
Snatching up the mouse
For lunch
Dinner
Or just a snack

Little Miss Pixie

Little Miss Pixie
By: James Dubeau

Little miss pixie
Flittering about my head
Pleasing me in ways
That should not be
Bringing me things
That should not be had
Buzzing about
Amusing me
Annoying me

Why is it
When you are
No where to be found
I am lost

Boulders

Boulders
By: James Dubeau

The heart must journey
Up narrow routes
Navigating twisting turns
Over the mountains of life
At any moment
Boulders could tumble
Or ground falls out
Killing on the spot
The trek never goes
As it was hoped
Through these treacherous lands
But in the end
The hike
Is well worth
The pain and torment

Star

Star
By: James Dubeau

You are nothing
But excuses
And complaints
Can’t do what it takes
To be happy
Because
X
Y
Z
Hold you back
Do not listen
To those voices
Silently murmuring
In the back of your head
They only plant excuses
Which are nothing
But reasons
You don’t want to hear
Be your own person
Do the brave thing
Dream big
And reach for it
For if you do
And if I know you
Like I do
You will be
A star

Line In The Sand

Line In The Sand
By: James Dubeau

Line in the sand
Can’t be crossed
Shouldn’t be crossed
By these heavy feet

Line in the sand
Marks where daemons roam
Free to play
Upon wicked ways

Line in the sand
On up ahead
Just beyond
Where salvation lies

Line in the sand
Thin red trickle
Slowly flowing
Dripping across dunes

Line in the sand
Crosses under
Circling buzzards
Cawing for me

Line in the sand
Leads me to
My comrades
Rotting corpses

Line in the sand
Pools blood at
My good friend’s
Outstretched palm

Line in the sand
Ended here
With these good men
And so will I

When I Knew Him

When I Knew Him
By: James Dubeau

When I knew him
We were both
Young men
Children really
Going though
The simple woes
That all do
At that age
As the years passed
We grew apart
As always happens
I deserted my friends
Left for college
When that failed
And I returned
I did not seek
Those friends
Which were left behind
As the sands of time
Buried them away
For a decade
Or so
But as the wind blows
Sand to obscure
Wind also blows
Sand to reveal
Slowly
Those lost friends
Are returning to me
One by one
In unexpected ways
But
When a hand extends
From the depths of sand
That might be
The only chance
I have to grab a hold
Bringing them back
Into my life
That one chance
Is what I had
With him
Instead of reaching out
Grabbing his hand
I let him slip under
Now he is gone
For good
And I can no longer
Speak to him
And say
We are still friends

I Don't Know

I Don’t Know
By: James Dubeau

I don’t know
What to say
What to think
When I look into your eyes
In bygone pictures
Of bygone times
All that I can do
Is kick myself
For not saying hi
When I heard you were in town
When I heard about the cancer
When I heard the end was near
Why did I not
Make that one
Single
Solitary
Step
After that decade
Was it fear
Was it denial
All that I can do now
Is hope
And pray
That you are looking
Down from above
Smiling
Over all the outpouring
From friends
And family
Those near and dear
As well as those
Who stood
At arms length

Robin

Robin
By: James Dubeau

It had all started
Like any other day
Full of work
And arguments
With the boss-man

So I took a moment
To be by myself
Cooling my heels
Away from there

And there she was
Questioning me
Questioning my right
Just to be there

Hanging on out
Under the slide
Near some swings
Kicking the rubber-chips

From that first moment
When I first saw her
My first look was locked
My first breath was stolen

Somehow words had found me
Explaining my day
And terrible ways
That left me on that playground

She humored me
And we got along
Conversing for hours upon hours
Until the sun hung low

Eventually it was time
To be on my way
So with a nod and a wink
I asked for her name

And what she had written
Upon my notepad
Could not be deciphered
Not by this old lad

Mixed in the scribbles
Appeared to be
Three different Qs
Not a name to me

My name is Robin
She said with a smile
I can see that
We laughed for a while

Want to have dinner
Tonight with me
She had asked
Hesitantly

Tonight is spaghetti
Topped with meatballs
Dine with me
And the family

I nodded
And followed
And smiled
And loved

Not So Different

Not So Different
By: James Dubeau

We are not so different
You and I
Cut from the same cloth
With the same die

Even though you are liberated and free
Letting it all go
As you wish and as you please

Crazy
Crazy hair
Crazy art
Crazy life
Crazy
Crazy
Crazy

Whereas I am conservative and uptight
Keeping it all in
Never forgetting what others may think

Sensible
Sensible hair
Sensible art
Sensible life
Sensible
Sensible
Sensible

That may be
Where our differences lie
But yet
Where our similarities rise

I Hate You

I Hate You
By: James Dubeau

I hate you
To the ends
Of my very being
I hate you
With
Rage that knows
No bounds
I hate you
With
A passion
Clenching
Fist at jaw
I hate you
With
A passion
That burns
Engulfing
My very soul
I hate you
With
A passion
That burns
So cold
That my veins are sliced
By icy blood
I
Hate
You

Your Court

Your Court
By: James Dubeau

Little green ball
Tossed from my hand
Reaching high
For the sky
Before plummeting back
Thwack
My racket sings
Through the air
Impacting upon
The fuzzy orb
Sending it hurtling
Away from me
With all my pent up
Rage
Hopes
Fears
Thoughts
Dreams
Into the hard realities
Of wooden walls
Thump
Rebounding now
The little planetoid
Returns to me
What that I had
Sent away
Thwack
Goes my racket again
Doubling my force
Doubling my effort
Thump
The ball returns
With heated fervor
Thwack
Thump
Thwack
Thump
Swish
Racket swings wide
Letting the ball
Get away
From me
From my racket
From my repeated bashing
But now I am ready
To get underway
With a grin
I pickup the ball
And flick it
Across the net
Are you ready?

Hit The Page

Hit The Page
By: James Dubeau

Write
Write
Write
That is what
They say
When you are
Locked
When you are
Blocked
When you are
Clocked?
Just keep them
Fingers on moving
Just keep them typing
Across those keys
Keep that Pen
Scribbling ink
Keep the thoughts
The emotions
The dreams
Flowing
And
Sooner or later
Something may come
Something decent
Shall hit the page

Goals

Goals
By: James Dubeau

Goals
Always
Seem
To
Be
Just
Out
Of
My
Reach

No matter how hard
I work
No matter how hard
I sweat
No matter how hard
I try

Something
Always
Happens

Never fail
Sand beneath my feet
Sinks away
Leaving me trapped
Just out of reach

No one to blame
But myself
For letting the
Deep
Dark
Dank
Recesses
Of my brain
Sabotage
My good intentions
My hard work
My goals
Leaving me

Empty handed

You & I

You & I
By: James Dubeau

Do you remember?
What you did
Do you remember?
How you felt
Do you remember?
The satisfaction you had
Do you remember?
The torment you caused
Do you remember?

I will not forget!
What you did
I will not forget!
How I felt
I will not forget!
The disappointment I had
I will not forget!
The torment I suffered
I will not forget!

I hope
What you did
Was worth it
For
I will not
Cannot
Not now
Not ever
Forgive