The Ups and Downs of Caps and Gowns

“Do it,” he said to me a few short hours ago as we were chugging beers. “No one will know.”

I took a long pull on my beer as I rolled it over in my mind. “But I’ll have no place to put my flask,” I retorted.

“I’ll be sitting right next to ya. I’ll make sure your booze won’t go missing… Besides, it’ll be an adventure to tell the grandkids.”

That’s how I got talked into this. My buddy passed the flask as I shivered in the Chicago night air. He kept ribbing me and chuckling. Finally it came to our turn to rise and follow the line of students towards the stage. The dean of students was handing out diplomas. I reached out to shake his hand and receive my diploma. A gust of wind rushed through the stage, blowing off my cap, raising my gown, and exposing my worth as a man to all the students and parents in the audience. The announcer called out my name…